What Kind Of Cat Does Dan Bilzerian Have

Hello, humans — it has been quite some time since our last correspondence, and I am sorry to report that my coveted position as Dan Bilzerian's only princess cat is now in jeopardy. You see, Dan and my mother of sorts, Andreea, have found another feline that they claim was meant to keep me company. But I am older and wiser, and know that Dan Bilzerian's new cat, Penelope, is vying for my crown. But fret not, humans, despite having only three legs, I'm the scrappiest Persian dollface you'll ever encounter, and no cat, four-legged or otherwise, is going to take me down without a fight. Or a tussle of absolute, almost unbearable cuteness, as you seem to perceive it.

I first met Penelope (a much less unique and invigorating name than mine, wouldn't you agree?) three days ago, when she was unceremoniously tossed into my favorite spot on the bed. Andreea was already calling her 'family,' which is confusing to me because I don't remember ever agreeing to a sibling. Humans are incredibly selfish, as you may well know, and I don't take kindly to this obvious lack of consideration, which is why our first photograph together makes me look a bit, well, scary.

Rawr.

Ready To Take You Wherever You Want. As Long As You're Hot. This is one airplane that doesn't. Bilzerian was born on December 7, 1980 in Tampa, Florida, the son of corporate takeover specialist Paul Bilzerian and Terri Steffen. He is the brother of fellow poker player Adam Bilzerian.He is of half Armenian descent through his father. His father was a corporate raider on Wall Street who provided both his sons with trust funds. Bilzerian claims to have subsequently enrolled at.

There may be room for approximately 2,390 women in Dan Bilzerian's life, but there is room for only cat, and it's name is me. I mean Smushball. The original.

Andreea, of course, has not quite gotten the message, and instead asked how best to socialize me with my new 'sister.' News flash, mom, there will be no socializing in this house, especially not when the newbie thinks it's even remotely acceptable to infringe upon my personal space. And let's be honest, everything is considered my personal space.

In what I can only assume was an effort to confuse me, Dan and Andreea then proceeded to give Penelope the same lion's haircut that I popularized, you know, last year. If they thought this would trick me into believing that I was only looking at my reflection when I looked at Penelope, I want to take this opportunity to tell the world that they were woefully mistaken. I know my perfect face when I see it, and that mug isn't it.

Of course, the humans, in the naivete that is so typical of their species, believe that I am already 'best friends' with Penelope, and that I am generous enough to share my electronics with her. But do not be fooled. This is just the facade I put up to garner more treats and attention.

What kind of cat does dan bilzerian have

To be fair, though, it was getting just a tiny bit lonely being the only cat in such a big house. And there is such a thing as too much attention, you know. I tried to channel my inner Grumpy Cat to express my malcontent to Dan and Andreea, but they don't always understand me as well as my kind do.

So Penelope, you're on my watch list, but behave yourself well enough, and you may just be able to share my throne. Well, not entirely share it, but sit slightly below me, as the world should be.

Images: smushball, _andreeacristina/Instagram

Welcome back! Here’s the second part and continuation of our Dan Bilzerian special. Are you ready to have your mind boggled?

Or, to see why Dan will stay an icon of the Playboy world, the Life of the Party, the avid Risk Taker that we have come to know and love him for?

Then this is the post for you and be amazed as we continue on part two of 10 Things You Didn’t Know About Dan Bilzerian.

Click here for Part 1.

6. He’s a Race Car Enthusiast

Being the avid race car enthusiast that he is, Dan once made a mind-blowing 400,000 dollar drag race wager against fellow enthusiast and Supreme Court Litigator, Tom Goldstein. Goldstein with his 2011 Ferrari 458 Italia and Dan with his ‘tricked out’ 1965 Shelby 427 Cobra went head to head in this high risk, one-of-a-kind quarter mile drag race that left everyone’s palms sweaty and tensions strung through the air. Dan won the race clocking in at 10.74 seconds and a top speed of 132.88 miles per hour. Goldstein lost the 400,000 dollar wager with a final time of 11.54 seconds and a top speed of 121.97 miles per hour. This was definitely a great win for our man, Dan Bilzerian.

7. He’s an Actor and Stuntman

Bilzerian dirtbiking in the desert

Dan has become a recent actor and stuntman as well. Having roles in the 2013 movies “Lone Survivor” starring Mark Wahlberg and “Olympus Has Fallen” starring Gerard Butler where he doubled for Butler’s stunts. He also had roles in the 2014 movies “The Equalizer” starring Denzel Washington, “Cat Run 2” and “The Other Women”. Dan also pushed 1 million dollars into the production of the “Lone Survivor” as a trade for a role in the movie as “Sr. Chief Dan Healy” that the producers promised would have at least 8 minutes of screen time and 80 words; this contract was breached and Dan only appeared in the movie for less than one minute with only one line. The conclusion is that Dan is busy suing the producers of Peter Berg’s “Lone Survivor” for the original 1 million dollars plus a 20 percent penalty fee.

8. He’s Bailed his Father out of Jail

Whilst enlisted in the Navy Dan once had to bail his dad, Paul Bilzerian-who was a prominent take-over specialist in the 1980’s, out of jail by signing over a third of his trust fund. His dad wasn’t very impressed with that and didn’t speak to Dan for 8 months and in Dan’s own words, in regards to his father, he says, “He was a man of principle.”

9. He’s an Altruist

Dan undoubtedly has an altruistic streak as well that few people ever see because of the image that he portrays. In 2013 he started “The Robin Hood Project” whose aim is to give back to the needy but only in 10,000 dollar installments at a time to avoid taxes in America. He has also helped a woman that lost all her limbs to make her home more handicapped accessible.

10. He’s a Cat Lover

Bilzerian’s cat, Smushball

Dan Bilzerian, built like a tank, chick and money magnet to the max, risk taker and gun fanatic by nature, ironically, along with the two goats, owns a cat called, “Smushball”. Who would’ve ever thought that Dan would be a the cat kind of guy but hey, Smushball is adorable and that I can’t contest.

11. Blitz Poker “Dan Bilzerian Lifestyle Simulator”

We all know that our favorite Instagram celebrity lives a lavish lifestyle; fast cars, beautiful women, loads of guns, private jets, wads of money in his back pocket and even more in the bank. He lives the life that many of us crave. However, we bet that you didn’t know that an app for your smartphone called ‘Blitz Poker’ has just been released that allows you to experience a small snippet of what it’s like to be Dan “Blitz” Bilzerian.

What Kind Of Cat Does Dan Bilzerian Have

Being awesome at Poker is how Dan Bilzerian made approximately $50 million of his fortune but now, with ‘Blitz Poker’, you can experience the same rush that Dan feels every time he holds a winning hand. ‘Blitz Poker’ is a play-money game and Dan even offers a $10,000 starting bonus and another $10,000 if you connect to your friends via Facebook. It features the Authentic Texas Hold ‘Em experience and you can also play a variety of other styles like Sit n’ Go, Tournaments and if you’re a bit more of the secretive type, you can smash the Poker tables anonymously in ‘Guest Mode’.

Not a poker player? No problem! We did promise a “Lifestyle Simulator”, after all. Mini-games that are featured in the ‘Blitz Poker’ app include shooting drones down in the desert with Dan and if you prove yourself to be a crack-shot, like Dan, you will unlock a myriad of other mini-games that include undoing bra’s, driving his truck full of half-naked babes, aiming dollar bills at a strippers G-string and well, the rest are a secret that beckon you toward them.

What Type Of Cat Does Dan Bilzerian Have

‘Blitz Poker’ is compatible both with iOS and Android and if you ever wanted to experience what it’s like to be Dan Bilzerian, you should definitely get ‘Blitz Poker’ on your smartphone straight away.

Well, there’s 10 things you didn’t know about Dan Bilzerian; I hope that you enjoyed getting to know him better as much as I did and keep on watching since Dan will definitely be leaving us stunned in the future. watch video below

Previous: Part 1

What Kinda Cat Does Dan Bilzerian Have

Next: Part 3